Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Randomize
