Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
How does one acquire holy water?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
