6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
