how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
