How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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