he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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