Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
