Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
