Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
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