? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
