i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
