i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
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