You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
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