guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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