If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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