Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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