They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
You left your phone here
Wait...
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize