First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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