so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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