called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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