It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Randomize
