i'm signing you up for texting rehab
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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