No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize