I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
