covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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