is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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