Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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