Non-Jews are for practice
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
