The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize
