i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
