But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
