So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Found the puke drawer
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
