if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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