Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
