half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
