Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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