what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize