Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
