Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
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