Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
It's never too late to be topless.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize