Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
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