Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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