whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
