Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
wanna go halves on a baby?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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