I skipped work to stalk him.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
