Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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