this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Randomize
