He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize