I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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