Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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