So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Randomize
