how hairy? two words: wookie tits
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize